What do you do when people disappoint you? I had this friend once who used to say "when people show you who they are believe them." Do I do that? If people show me a trait I dont like, I very quickly think of motivations/reasons they might have behaved in a certain way, and I excuse away the offensive behaviour/issue. Is that good for me to do? Do I want to be someone that will cut ties? I want to believe the best about everyone. I want to be someone that embraces a spirit of goodwill toward EVERYONE. But it feels sometimes that this means that I am going to get hurt, and attract relationships that allow bad treatment and boundary pushing.
I dont know what the solution is.
Hey Bri, what an awesome blog, good stuff. I LOVE that saying - "when people show you who they are, believe them".. I thinnk I'll have to spread the word on that one, and maybe follow the advice myself.
ReplyDeletexo Emma
Yep so true. Briohne I think you DO know what the solution is - it's the title of your post :) I think that believing the best of everyone, and believing when they show you who they are can happen at the same time. Look up the term false dichotomy. The two things you're talking about aren't mutually exclusive!
ReplyDeleteSimultaneously holding two apparently conflicting ideas to be true is a very very useful skill, and once you get the hang of it you'll find it's not as impossible as it first sounds.